EXPANDING YOUR COMFORT ZONE

Why do some people feel a fear and stress response when they see this image and others simply see and feel peace and freedom? 

We all perceive the world we live in to be different from one another. The world I live in is completely unique and totally different to the world you live in because our perception of reality is different. 

My world is a place for adventure and exploration. A place to discover new experiences, new friends, new realities. As much as I love to explore the planet and my external universe, the world is also a space to explore my internal universe. A chance to explore my body, my thoughts and emotions, my awareness, consciousness. 

What i’ve learned through Yoga is that my internal world inevitably shapes my external world. How I feel inside dictates what I see outside, not the other way around. By taking the time to slow down and become introverted i’ve learned that the experience of life really is just a constant reaction to the external world, and the best thing about learning this? I am in charge of the way I perceive things! 

With all that i’ve learned in my moments of stillness and self-study, expanding my comfort zone is one aspect of life that I have become the most fascinated with. Here’s what i’ve learnt and how I learned to expand my comfort zone:

The first step towards expanding my comfort zone was getting a clearer mind. The first thing I did was eradicate physical pain from my body. When my body was in pain, after breaking my back and sustaining many other injuries and before practising Yoga, it was pretty hard to not be constantly thinking about the pain I was feeling, and it stole a lot of my attention away from experiencing the external world. But now that my body is healthy and pain free my mind is clear to enjoy the experiences of the external world without any interruptions. Keeping your vessel in tip-top shape will create a longer and happier existence, as well as more opportunities. It also makes it easier to establish a clear mind.

The next step was to begin constantly observing how different experiences made me feel inside, especially the negative experiences. Surfing really big waves made me feel nervous, standing on the edge of a big cliff made my stomach churn, super crowded places stressed me out, sitting alone without any distractions created a weird feeling known as ‘boredom’. I began observing these negative reactions I was having in certain moments of life and really trying to experience them in their entirety, figuring out why they exist and if the way I felt was necessary, like for escaping immediate danger, or if it was just a ‘bad habit’ I had developed. It felt uncomfortable at first, of course, because for my whole life i’d been fleeing from discomfort rather than welcoming it in with open arms.

Within about 6 months I had started to re-wire how I perceived certain experiences. Big waves weren’t scary anymore. Surfing amongst them was a way to experience life at a different vibration. With adrenaline pumping through my body I could enjoy having a faster reaction time and hawk like focus. It’s also a very humbling experience, it makes me feel so insignificant compared to the power and mercilessness of Mother Nature. Externally, the same experiences were happening. Internally, my experiences were completely different because I perceived them in a different way.

As i’ve gradually been working on finding comfort in uncomfortable situations I find myself feeling at peace more often in life. As I expand my comfort zone i’m able to reach new levels of performance in bodyboarding and movement because I don’t have as much inner conflict. I can find a state of flow in moments that I used to be stressed in. Now that it has become a habit to explore the borders of my comfort zone I find myself searching for new experiences, which is leading to a life full of adventures. By observing what’s happening internally i’m building a deeper connection to myself and what reality really is. Because at the deepest level of my existence, and your existence for that matter, we are all a part of a universal consciousness. If i’m able to watch my thoughts and observe my emotions then that must mean I am not my thoughts or my emotions, i’m something deeper, Something greater. At the deepest level i’m a fleck of consciousness itself that has been blessed with this body and mind that I call ‘Me’. And you are another little fleck of this Universal Consciousness that’s inside of your body and mind, quietly and silently observing your life unfold, whether you’re aware of it or not.

I’ll get deeper into the topic of ‘Who Am I’ in another story.

So, where was I? Oh, yeh… the next step.

The step i’m at now is trying to focus on the good in every situation, pleasant and unpleasant moments. No moment is either good OR bad. Like the philosophy of Yin and Yang, good and bad depend on each other to exist. How can you explain what ‘good’ means if you don’t already understand the meaning of ‘bad’? So there’s positivity to be experienced in every situation, and by focussing on the good you’re naturally going to experience more pleasant feelings in life. By focussing on the good in uncomfortable situations you’re going to find a little bit of comfort and your ‘comfort zone’ will naturally expand. By continually working at this level the sky’s the limit.

So, this all sounds easy to read, but it’s hard to just “feel comfortable in uncomfortable situations”. How do you do it and what do you focus on to get better at it? The breath. 

The breath is the most powerful tool you have to alter the state of your body and your mind. When you notice an unpleasant feeling or reaction taking place inside due to feeling out of your depth in an activity, simply slow down by breathing mindfully. Instead of reacting straight away based on your last similar experience, take some deep diaphragmatic breaths. This will take you out of the driver’s seat and into the passenger’s seat and you will become the observer of your thoughts and the situation, rather than the frantic monkey mind that you may or may not think you are. 

Experience your feelings, your thoughts and your emotions from a calm and composed place inside. Let the breath be your anchor to the present moment and let it teach you that you’re in charge of your internal universe. From here you may find more comfort in the moment, which means you’re in the process of expanding your comfort zone! If you can’t control your breath and if you can’t find any comfort then maybe you have taken a jump that was a little too far into the unknown, or maybe you really are in a place of danger that needs to be acted upon immediately.

“Baby steps. Consistently exploring the borders of your comfort zone will see more progress than jumping straight into the deep end and possibly creating more stress in certain situations.”

Sometimes stress is needed to escape immediate danger, yes. And it’s great survival instinct to have, it keeps us safe. But there’s too much stress in the world. I see it everywhere I look. People rushing around and living like chickens with their heads chopped off. No one stopping to smell the flowers or take a deep breath anymore. Everyone fixated on what’s happening later or dwelling on what happened yesterday. Stress is taking over people because people have forgotten to live in the moment. People have forgotten to live mindfully and focus on what’s happening right now.

So go out and explore the world and push your limits! If, like me, you’re driven to push yourself in life to see how far you can take it then go! But be smart, know your limits and be real about your set of skills. Be sensible, be mindful, take baby steps, and always act from a place of love for yourself and for others!